Teetering on the western edge of the Australian mainland, Perth beckons to the intrepid urban traveller from its place as the most isolated city in the world. But that doesn’t mean that fun is very far away.
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Closer to Indonesia’s capital than its own nation’s, Perth is a really long way from anywhere. That said, this city and its surroundings have an incredible variety of things to see and do, which is just as well.
When a bunch of mates decide to head over for the ill-fated 2025 Ashes’ First Test, they find more free time in Perth than they bargain for.
From lively nightlife in the city to wine regions with bucolic cellar doors to elegant architecture and plenty of history, it turns out that Western Australia’s keystone town has more than enough to keep a crop of cricket-bereft blokes busy for the weekend.
Yes, I was part of that group of mates, and here’s what we got up to.
Click each heading below to jump to that day’s adventures. Don’t worry, you can always come back up here!
Day 1 – Ashes to Ashes
Day 2 – Dust to Dusty
Day 3 – Freo to Roam
Day 4 – Doubloons, Dumplings and Delays
From the biggest pub in Australia to the oldest running pub in WA, and what proves to be the shortest Ashes Test in 137 years, here’s what happens when a bunch of east coast lads head west.
Brett, Nim and I in Sydney Airport with our first beers of the trip
It Begins
After months of planning, and even more time spent in talk and discussion, it’s finally time to board our plane to Perth.
For some of us (not me), this is our first time to Perth. For others (me), this will be our first Ashes test. But the brief is quite simple: let’s watch plenty of cricket and have a beer or two.
But what transpires is quite the opposite.
Five of us arrive in Perth at roughly the same time. Frenchie has some business to take care of (plus a flight delay), so the rest of us — me, Brett, Brownie, Dom and Nim — make our way to the nearest pub for drinks and dinner.
Flying over the Swan Valley’s vineyards as we land in Perth
The Grosvenor Hotel is a cracker. Set on the corner of Hay Street and Hill Street, it’s been here since 1886 and is one of just three remaining Perth pubs from the 1880s.
It’s also closely associated with social gatherings for the Perth Football Club, which had its home at the WACA, so we’ve started strong with the sporting and cricket link.
After a couple of beers, most of us move to local wine: a delicious Vasse Felix Sem Sauv from Margaret River.
In spite of his frequent calls in days to come, Dom will be sad to learn that tonight’s meal will be his only chance to sample nachos from WA this trip. The good news is it’s a tasty iteration of Dom’s desire.
Me, Brownie, Brett, Nim and Dom in the Grosvenor Hotel, and a very respectable spice bag (nachos not pictured)
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Perth Day 1: Ashes to Ashes
After breakfast , the six of us troop through Gloucester Park and join the throngs of fellow cricket fans crossing the oxbow arc of the Swan River to the mighty 60,000-seater Perth Stadium.
Barely seven years old, this beautiful arena is packed to the brim with a sell-out crowd excited to see their country duel it out for cricket’s most venerated trophy.
England win the toss and choose to bat, and then things go badly wrong. Including four ducks (two golden), everyone’s out by 3pm and they’ve manage to scrape together 175 runs. The Aussies are all smiles, but by the end of the first day, they’ve lost nine wickets too.
It’s action-packed, but for all the wrong reasons.
We spend the morning sessions in our seats until the boiling disc of WA sunshine turns its Sauronic eye towards us. We duck for cover to the Camfield — the stadium’s onsite watering hole and reputedly the biggest pub in Australia.
We take advantage of the 175 beer taps until stumps on the first day with Australia still batting, but with only two wickets to spare and 49 runs to chase.
After a quick nap, shower and change at our hotel, we’re back in the mix for dinner and drinks.
We explore Perth’s city centre, which is so lively; the energy here is wonderful. After a while, we settle on Furaibo Izakaya and Bar, a busy modern Japanese restaurant in Murray Street Mall, and delve into an assortment of tasty dishes.
We wander around the city for a while until we find ourselves at the State Buildings. Once a hub for Perth politics and governance, this grand old heritage building is now a centre for high-end retail, hotels, bars and restaurants.
We tuck ourselves away in Beer Corner, a boutique watering hole serving craft beers from around WA. Brett, the beer monster among us, is in his element with the 20 taps clamouring for his attention.
We all settle on a beer. Apart from Dom, who insists on a tasting paddle of tiny beer pots, putting us all to shame with our single big glasses.
Looking further into the State Buildings complex, we discover a lovely little wine bar — the Wine Merchant — for a night cap.
Part of the highly-regarded Petition Restaurant, this nook of a bar sells takeaway wine, but also wine by the glass. You can also buy a bottle, sit down here and drink it. I wish there were more places like this.
We find a table big enough for six and set Brownie — our wine aficionado — to the task of picking something wonderful to drink.
He does such a good job, we end up in a little vertical tasting; the same bottle separated by 23 vintages! The 2001 is by far the superior.
Before we leave, Brownie and Frenchie squeeze our host for some recommendations of bars in the area. This will come in handy tomorrow!
I love a local tip, so here’s what’s on his list:
Bar Lafayette, Bobeche, Brookfield Place, Terrarium, Foxtrot Unicorn and Varnish on King.
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Perth Day 2: Dust to Dusty
Today, we don’t have tickets for the cricket as we bargained on a ‘normal’ test and thought Day 3 would be the better option.
I have put together a mini itinerary to go and check out Perth’s Swan Valley Wine Region, the second oldest in Australia after the Hunter Valley and only half an hour out of the city.
We kick off with a tasty breakfast at one of Frenchie’s finds: Double A On the River, a cafe right on the banks of the Swan. Then the six of us somehow squeeze into a single Uber and head for Lancaster Wines on the outer reaches of the Swan Valley.
We’re one of the first to arrive at this open-air cellar door among the vines, but the place fills up fast with tour groups.
Lancaster has vines that were planted in 1829, some of the oldest in the region, and the wine reflects that. Their Chenin Blanc, Chardonnay and Old Vine Shiraz are excellent, but their fortified Sticky Shiraz is unique and delicious.
Next, we head to Sandalford Wines. This is the Swan Valley’s most established and commercial winery. Its long, sweeping tasting bar fills one side of the room while the other is a boutique displaying beautifully curated oddments, art, stemware, and merch.
We work our way through the tasting, relishing the Chenin Blanc, Rosé and botrytis Semillon.
Brett is on a charm offensive — our next stop is through a potentially locked gate at the back of the venue to Mandoon Estate and Homestead Brewery. It’s either that or a very long walk round.
Thankfully, Brett’s fluttering lashes do the trick and the kind lady tips us off as to the gate’s whereabouts.
Mandoon Estate and its connected microbrewery is a busy family-focused spot with big tables spread across a wide rolling lawn. Pizzas next to the beer bar are the way forward and we give the beer tasting paddles a nudge too before heading into the winery’s neat cellar door and tasting room.
Once again, Chenin Blancs, Chardonnays, Shiraz and a very respectable reserve Cabernet are the order of the day, as well as happy, friendly service.
We retire to a table in the expansive restaurant bar beyond the cellar door with perfect views of the TV and the cricket, which is turning into a repeat of Day 1.
Soon, it’s time to move again and we shoehorn ourselves into another maxi-taxi for a quick trip to the quaint little town of Guildford and to Western Australia’s oldest operating pub, the Rose and Crown Hotel.
This beautiful old pub has a history that goes back to 1841, and its redbrick walls, buzzing courtyard beer garden and even a dining room in the cellar echo with history.
We score a sofa and armchairs right in front of the big TV in the old part of the pub and watch the craziest Ashes test we’ve ever seen.
With both teams batting like they need to be somewhere, it’s all over before the end of Day Two, with Australia winning by eight wickets. It’s the shortest Ashes test in 137 years.
Back in the city, we get changed for our dinner booking at Sentinel Bar and Grill. This New York bistro style eatery has plenty of options on the menu, and we pick a few things to share.
The baked halloumi with roasted pear, hot honey and walnut is tasty and the two pasta dishes we order are great, but the on-the-bone ribeye, which we had high hopes for, doesn’t really hit the mark.
Standout though, is the steak tartare with quail egg yolk and aioli.
From the barman’s notes the night before, we hunt down Foxtrot Unicorn for a cocktail or two.
Known for being Perth’s most awarded cocktail bar, this atmospheric subterranean speakeasy is in an old bank vault built in 1887. With its timber-clad walls, eclectic up-cycled decor and low, dark ceilings, this is my kind of bar.
After a couple of cocktails, most of the guys head back to the hotel, but Nim and I stick around for a drink or two more. A drink or two? Who am I kidding? We stay until the lights go up!
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Freo to Roam
We’re all pretty slow to wake this morning. With the test over, our Day 3 tickets are useless, so Frenchie finds a great little cafe called Cravings for breakfast where we plot our trajectory.
Our plans eventually settle on Fremantle.
Leaning an elbow out into the Indian Ocean, Fremantle and its vibrant bar scene is also Perth’s historic centre.
There’s plenty for us to see and do here, though our first port of call — after a brisk march through Fremantle Markets — is the Norfolk Hotel. This big busy corner pub has barely opened, but we find our way in and stick around for a couple of hours.
From there, we explore the busy streets lined with elegant colonial architecture that houses Fremantle’s thriving retail and hospitality scenes. We find our way to the coast and the historic Whaler’s Tunnel, built by the whaling fleet to make transferring their hauls into the markets easier.
Here, we also find the Round House, a 19th Century prison and the first permanent building of the Swan Valley Colony.
But that’s not why we’re in this part of town.
This is a shortcut to Gage Roads Brewery (how predictable of us!) where we score a rare table on the wharf looking out over the water while we work through some tasting paddles.
Making our way back into the heart of Freo, we nab another coveted table at the rooftop bar of the National Hotel. This grand old beauty caught our eye as we were wandering the streets earlier, and from four storeys above, this charming hotel gives up perfect views of the town.
After a few, we clamber back down to earth in more ways than one; Brett insists on us having a quick beer in the Buffalo Club.
There were once many Buffalo Clubs all over the world, which were started in the 1820s as the Antediluvian Order of Buffaloes. In fact, Christina’s grandmother was once a member of the Darwin chapter.
These days, only a few remain and ‘The Buff’ in Freo has definitely seen better days. But the beer’s cold (and quite cheap) and the service and locals couldn’t be more welcoming.
Between pubs, some of us even find time to do a spot of thrifting for some ‘weird shit’ in Fremantle!
Our final stop as evening draws in is a little door down a side street that everyone in the group is claiming they saw first.
This swashbuckling bar is Darling Darling and the resounding favourite of the weekend.
As our eyes adjust to our gloomy surroundings, we realise just how unique this little place is. Walls are strung with old ropes and naval knots, broad-bottomed candles have glued themselves to tables and low-slung candelabras, and there’s a crunch underfoot from empty monkey nut shells.
Ensconced at a little table against a timber-clad wall, we entertain ourselves by throwing shells at each other — this is Frenchie and Nim’s favourite part of the whole day — while we await cocktails from the lone barman. If any of us knew a sea shanty, this would be the place for it.
It’s not until someone — probably Dom — announces they’re hungry that we dislodge ourselves and head to Cicerello’s to see if their claim of ‘the home of fish n chips’ is valid.
The food’s not bad, but it makes me wonder what the self-proclaimed title really means. It’s a chippy that’s been going for over 100 years, so they must be doing something right.
But we hurry back to Darling Darling and stay for a while longer, filling up the corners with more free peanuts and artfully made seafaring cocktails.
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Day 4 – Doubloons, Dumplings and Delays
It’s time to leave Perth for our respective homes. But before we go, there’s still time for a bit more adventure.
Brett has been jonesing for a trip the Perth Mint since we got here, so we check out and find coffee (and very tasty homemade empanadas that Nim and I indulge in) from The Sansrival Cafe, right across from the mint.
We’re the first group of the day at the mint and our guide is clearly a morning person. She’s brilliant and funny, deadpan and well trained.
She takes us round the mint, shows us the one tonne solid gold dollar coin and then pours molten gold into an ingot. We also learn about the 1890s gold rush in WA, and that people still buy gold here; Nim overhears someone buying a kilo of it. That’s over $200,000 at current values.
After the tour, Dom leaves us for the airport and the rest of us are a little peckish. Someone has the brilliant idea of yum cha, and we hunt down Six Fortune Northbridge Chinese Restaurant (and Canton Roe next door) for a host of dumpling goodies and a lazy susan.
Bellies full, we waddle out of the restaurant and make our way slowly to the hotel for our left luggage.
Our number dwindles to four as Brownie heads to his private jet. We’re left bunkered down amongst the FIFOs as we watch our flight suffer delay after delay.
Fortunately, the bar’s open in the terminal though. Brett and I stick to beers, but Nim and Frenchie hit the vino. Hopefully we’ll all sleep well on the flight — if it ever gets here.
Hours later — just before midnight — I step through the door to find Christina on the sofa, asleep. She’s tried to wait up for me; a herculean effort and one I barely manage myself. It’s been an excellent trip away, but as always, it’s good to be home.
