How to Do a Perfect Tim Tam Slam

Mr and Mrs Romance - How to do the perfect Tim Tam Slam

I come from a long line of biscuit dunkers. My father dunked and his father before him. But the Tim Tam Slam is the very pinnacle of dunking excellence.

Dunking is a highly skilled process. It requires poise, confidence, a deep knowledge of your medium. A failure on any of these fronts will end in your biscuit dropping into your tea. Dunking’s tough – but it’s worth it!

The strategy needed to pull off the perfect Slam is more complex than any biscuit dunk known to man… but first things first.

Mr and Mrs Romance - the Tim Tam slam

A Tim Tam – for you poor devils who haven’t tried one – is a chocolate biscuit with a creamy filling and covered in a layer of choc.

The UK’s humble McVitie’s Penguin is where Tim Tams originate from, but like humans and the apes, Tim Tams have evolved to be an entirely more advanced creature.

A Tim Tam Slam occurs when you ‘drink’ a hot beverage through the Tim Tam like a straw. The hot liquid fills the biscuit, melting everything inside. You’re left with a chocolate bag of melty genius.

The Tim Tam Slam

Mr and Mrs Romance - The Perfect Tim Tam Slam

Here’s what you need:

  • A hot drink – tea, coffee, hot choc, mocca, chai… you get the idea.
  • A pack of Tim Tams.
  • Incisor teeth – 1 set of.

Mr and Mrs Romance - Tim Tams ready for slamming

Here’s what you do:

  1. Bite the corner off your Tim Tam.
  2. Turn the Tim Tam and bite the diagonally opposite corner off.
  3. Hold the Tim Tam like a straw and dip the end in your drink.
  4. Suck your drink through the Tim Tam until some of your tasty beverage is in your mouth.
  5. Carefully but quickly eat your biscuit.
  6. Settle into a bed of pillows half-cut and enjoy the rush of pleasure as your mouth experiences tastebud nirvana.

Mr and Mrs Romance - Doing the Tim Tam Slam

Mr and Mrs Romance - Doing the coffee Tim Tam Slam

Mr-Romance---Doing-the-coffee-Tim-Tam-Slam

Areas of danger:

  • Don’t hold your Tim Tam in the drink too long or it will collapse and disappear into your tea. This is a horrible feeling, and – to be honest – an amateur mistake.
  • Don’t take too long to eat your Tim Tam either. To hold it up and admire it is to beckon on a bickie apocalypse. As it is written, so the Tim Tam shall rise, so it shall fall. Right into your lap. Very messy.
  • Biting the biscuit in half can also turn into choc-tastrophy. The insides are so soft and squishy, the whole thing will fall apart. Popping the whole thing in your mouth really is your best bet.

Which flavour to choose:

This is where things get personal. I enjoy the surety the Tim Tam Original affords. Mrs Romance, however, lives a life of opulence and indulgence, and so enjoys a Choc Double Coat Tim Tam to slam. She says the double chocolate coating gives the biscuit more structure so it doesn’t collapse as easily. It’s the thinnest veiled ruse I’ve ever heard of.

There are so many flavours to choose from here in Australia, we really are spoilt. The UK and Canada have a limited range to enjoy.

Mr and Mrs Romance - New flavour Tim Tam Slam

But recently, the game changed again! Famed patissier Adriano Zumbo has collaborated with Arnott’s to bring out three new incredible flavours. The Raspberry White Choc, the Salted Caramel and the Choc Brownie all hit stores 3rd March 2014 and the Slam Nation will be in its element!

In fact these new flavours have brought Mrs Romance and me closer together: we both love the Salted Caramel be it to slam or otherwise.

What is your favourite Tim Tam flavour? Or do you have a personal favourite bickie to dunk?

Images by Mrs Romance.

12 Comments

  • Reply February 27, 2014

    lara @swatchgirl.com

    May I recommend also trying a lighter, more summery version? Make up a glass of nice cold matcha on good soy milk, completely bite the ends off a Tim Tam, then slurp that sucker up. The cold milk keeps the Tim Tam from melting and provides a longer, more refreshing slam with a refreshing and tasty combo of slightly sweet milky green tea and choc.

    Citation: I am a big fat chick, therefore I am an expert on shoving Tim Tams into my cavernous maw.
    lara @swatchgirl.com recently posted..MAC Prep + Prime BB Compact SPF30 reviewMy Profile

    • Reply February 27, 2014

      Mrs Romance

      Tim Tam Slams for all seasons! LOVE this idea Lara. You are a genius.

  • Reply February 27, 2014

    Sonia from Sonia Styling

    This has to be one of your best posts ever – and it’s all down to that fantastic GIF of Jim doing the Slam! I know what will be making its way into my shopping trolley next week: one (possibly two) packets of salted caramel Tim Tams. Yum!
    Sonia from Sonia Styling recently posted..What Sonia Wore: Weekend and WeekdayMy Profile

    • Reply February 27, 2014

      Mr Romance

      Ha ha! I’m blushing, Sonia! I didn’t know how powerful my slam technique could be! ;-)

  • Reply February 27, 2014

    Smaggle

    I LOVE this one! I love Jim’s happy Tim Tam fingers at the end. Best.

    • Reply February 27, 2014

      Mr Romance

      That’s spectacular, Smags! I tend to do those fingers a fair bit – they’re called Tim Tam fingers from now on though – or maybe Jim Tam fingers! Chris used to call them jazz hands… I prefer ‘Tim Tam hands’!

  • Reply February 28, 2014

    Mama Stylista

    Love this post!! You guys are the best. The Tim Tam slam is a very fine skill and it could go horribly wrong. These tips are gold. I’m glad you mentioned the old school original McVitie’s Penguin btw! x
    Mama Stylista recently posted..Shoe of the Week: Mollini Lions Leopard PumpMy Profile

    • Reply February 28, 2014

      Mr Romance

      It really can turn bad fast, Dee! I’ve had a couple of nasty ones where a whole chunk has fallen off into the drink. Very sad sight.
      I just had to include Penguins – they’re a part of my school lunch heritage. They are slammable too, but not quite as good as Tim Tams I must admit.
      Jx

  • […] MrAndMrsRomance.com today, we talk about how to do a Tim Tam Slam. It’s one of the most delicious things to eat the world has ever produced. So good in fact, […]

  • Reply March 11, 2014

    Melody

    My sister introduced me to this a few years ago after her Australian roommate introduced it to her. Love.
    Melody recently posted..8×10 Print – Life is a Daring Adventure – Helen Keller by EverybodyElseMy Profile

    • Reply March 12, 2014

      Mrs Romance

      I’m glad to hear other Aussies are spreading the word – it’s so good! Thanks for commenting Melody :)

  • […] If you’re not sure how best to eat these wonders the biscuit world, here’s how to perform the perfect Tim Tam Slam! […]

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